Don't Judge Me

I was almost that drunk. I'm not sure who this poor soul is, but I hope she made it home. I feel like a rat crawled in my mouth and died. I woke up wearing men's underwear and a wife beater with a vibrator under my pillow. Harms is on the road to recovery as well. I have plans of taking a nap in the room where nursing mothers pump their milk. I have needs too. I have a sneaking suspicion I made Jesus cringe last night. Not even kolaches could save us today. It took Jack in the Box and battle throw ups to make us feel human again. I puked in my shoe, but my feet don't stink. Maybe Jesus isn't mad at me after all.